Piquant news. Advices of the adulterer: how to two-time with impunity (part II)
The sixth rule: be attentive to minutiae.
A hair on the coat lapel, strange perfume smell, a tie, given by the lover: a lot of adulterers were caught thanks to trivia! Follow women’s example; they are much more provident.
The seventh rule: controlling your wife you don’t let her to control you thus.
You should always know where your wife is if you don’t want to be caught during the coition with your lover. Call her, report her about your plans and actions, avoid impertinent lie, but leave a space for maneuver. What a good invention mobile phone is. On the one hand your wife can call you any moment, and this creates the illusion of controlling, but on the other hand she can’t be sure where exactly you are and has to believe your word. Besides, a lover can call to your mobile phone freer and it’s absolutely not necessary for her to know your home number. If you drive car it will help you a lot. You may always get stuck in a fuse calling to your wife from time to time and complaining about your calamitous situation.
As to e-mail this is an uncertain thing. The author of this text had once big troubles because of it: he left on business and his wife suddenly descried “Outlook” and a letter of an absolutely unambiguous content. It was a hurricane. So, like Vanessa Paradise sang “passwords, passwords, passwords”.
The eighth rule: have secret money. You should have money that is not under control of your wife. Even if “all is in common” between you, you should hide some money, at least a little. Al Capone was put in prison for not paying taxes and you can be caught if your wife catches out a hole in your family budget. If you can’t hide necessary amount at once you better ask a trusty to give it to you on credit and return it piecemeal. It will help you not being a meticulous scrooge that will surely not serve you good.
The ninth rule: avoid excesses. I won’t even comment such horrors as pregnancy of your lover or venereal diseases. But you shouldn’t permit a quarrel with your lover or a conflict between your lovers. You should follow the same rules with respect to each of them as with respect to your wife. Be peaceful, kind, amiable, don’t promise what you are not able to fulfill and hold everything under control. Break relationships up in such a way so revenge is excluded: it will be offensive to appear with both: no wife, neither lover.
The tenth rule: never lose vigilance. To two-time isn’t to have rest. It’s a hard work and craftsmanship. If you relax, lose sight of some detail, you can loose everything. Of course, experience helps but don’t take liberties excessive self-sufficiency. Everything has to be like at war and like for the first time.